Why do men get mistresses?

Why do men get mistresses? - A spicy topic that occupies the minds of all girls and women. Moreover, this subtle problem is of equal interest to wives and mistresses. What motivates men to commit betrayal? How to view the appearance of a mistress: as a fleeting admiration or betrayal?

To understand why men get mistresses, you first need to understand the psychology of betrayal. Man - part of the diverse animal world, wildlife. Each is a male by nature. Every man tries to become an alpha male, ie a dominant, a leader. By nature, except for some species of animals such as dolphins, swans, penguins, all animals are polygamous.

Men get mistresses at different ages for different reasons.

  • Age category - up to 25 years. In the process of becoming a man asserts himself, many of it is manifested in the possession of a large number of women. On a subconscious level, men view sex as the subordination of the female half. As a result, "warms up" selfishness. That is why in adolescence boys often have a chaotic sex life. Leads the value of quantity over quality. Having married at an early age, men have mistresses without guilt, because they do not find anything wrong with it.
  • Age category - up to 45 years. Awareness of their own importance, the emergence of solid life goals, a man brings into adulthood not only the baggage of knowledge, experience and skills, but also the baggage of unfulfilled sexual desires. As a rule, a man can not or does not want to admit it, so he begins to look for an answer elsewhere. Another reason may be the false misconception from a young age that a real man should have many women, the so-called "youthful maximalism", transferred to adulthood.
  • Age category - from 45 years. The peak is when men get mistresses, most often young ones. Old age is approaching, the terrible word "impotence" is floating in the brain and a man, in order not to fall in the eyes of society, gets mistresses, sometimes several. This is a particularly dangerous period, and a woman should show her wisdom as much as possible.

In addition to the age aspects, why men get mistresses, is affected by the crisis in the relationship:

  • The first crisis occurs 2 years after living together. The couple already knows enough about each other, sex becomes monotonous and the husband decides to have a mistress. This crisis is relatively easy, it is enough to diversify your sex life, spend your free time differently and you can avoid the danger of betrayal.
  • The next crisis comes after 10 years of married life. The most dangerous. The couple thoroughly studied each other's habits, all topics were discussed. The man and the woman got tired of living together, life, problems with children. During this period, it is desirable to rest a little from each other, go somewhere at sea. The halves need to cool off from all the problems and resentment, get bored, and, finally, understand that they are made for each other, and they do not need extra people in the relationship.
  • Crisis after 30 years of marriage. The children grew up and started their own families. The couple is no longer united. In this case, usually save grandchildren.

To finally understand why men get lovers - you need to understand that in 99% of cases they do it unconsciously, that is, they do not see this as betrayal. What can not be said about women who have two main causes of betrayal: revenge and dissatisfaction with a partner.

The site Charivna considered the question of why men get mistresses in terms of psychology, which explains a lot in the behavior of the stronger sex. But it's not just genetic memory and complexes that push men to find another woman.

Often women themselves contribute to the fact that men get mistresses

The heroes of our topic brought clarity to this chaos. Many men of different ages, nationalities and statuses were interviewed. And, despite such obvious diversity, many agreed on two main ideas why men decide to have mistresses:

  • Boredom. General life is dangerous monotonous moments in sexual life. The man is looking for thrills, wants to bring variety to intimacy. That's why a person is on the side. The man is re-experiencing the taste of novelty, he is interested in studying another woman's body (what they love with their eyes - everyone knows). This is not always a danger.
  • The second main reason is his fantasies. Often men cannot admit to their wives their desires, which sometimes go beyond the standard. Sometimes a man can not even imagine his beloved woman in his wild imagination, because he sees in her the mother of his children, a decent wife. Such stereotypes should be broken if a woman wants to have a faithful husband, as there will always be one who does not bury.

These main reasons for betrayal were named by the men themselves. As for real life, there are many other factors of betrayal, such as:

  • revenge - sometimes a man can change consciously;
  • domestic problems in the family that depress the husband;
  • stereotype of father's behavior, taken from childhood;
  • negative influence of friends;
  • and many other reasons can cause men to have mistresses.

As for the mistresses with whom men betray, they can be divided into three categories:

  • Rival. Most often - it's spontaneous sex. He just liked her, but it's unlikely to grow into something more serious. This usually happens at parties.
    Mistress. The rival became a mistress, simply put, she touched him. It's not just about intimacy, but also about the fact that she became his favorite girl. They often spend leisure time together, he shares problems with her. There are problems in the family, and with it - love. The mistress flatters, the wife grumbles. Do you see the difference? So first you need to direct the relationship in a different direction to avoid such an outcome.
  • Divorce. Your husband realized that she was his soulmate. They already have a common life, and not so dim. He is more comfortable with her. And he decided to go to another woman.
  • What to do next? In the second stage, when the husband has a mistress, something can still be done, and when he decides to go to her, it is better to let go. The main thing - decide what you need. Do you want to be with him next? How serious is everything? Why did he do that? Is it your fault? After answering these questions, make decisions and actions. If you want to continue living together - change, you can't forgive - break up.

And in order not to wonder why men have a mistress, it is better to become his wife and mistress at the same time. There are many ways. It is important to understand that sex plays an important role in a man's life, and that he should always be there and love you - you need to nurture his self-esteem.