How not to compare yourself with others

We meet other people every day. Women and men, very young and old. And sometimes we catch ourselves comparing them to ourselves. Psychologists consider such actions destructive, because there will always be those who are more beautiful than us and who are less beautiful, who are smarter than us and who are less intelligent, who has better, worse ... The list goes on and on.

If you constantly compare yourself with others - this is the road to nowhere. And, except for a bad mood, will not give anything. A person with a healthy self-esteem will never say "I am the most beautiful, the smartest, etc." It is impossible. Why? And by what criteria the most beautiful, the smartest, etc.? Compared to what / who?

So what to do? How not to compare yourself with others, if it has already become an involuntary habit?

How not to compare yourself with others?

The answer is simple: "Compare yourself with YOURSELF in the past (a year ago, a week ago, a few months ago)." After all, it can be noted that in this I became better, in this I learned such things, I look better now than then. In this way, you will be able to notice your changes, your development process, which leads to greater development of your personality.

Of course, we sometimes like to look at other people. For example, you go in transport, you have a great mood, you know that you look good. And here comes a man who (as you think) is much better than you.

We often pay attention to what we want ourselves, but for some reason we do not have at the moment. You may be jealous. Ordinary human envy. All people are jealous from time to time. There is nothing wrong with that. The main thing - what will you do with this envy?

You can just spoil your mood. Like, he (she) is better than me. You can look for flaws in this person. For example, oh, the suit is so beautiful and the shoes are nightmarish. And what? What do you get out of it? The fleeting pleasure of finding defects in the subject of your envy? This is self-deception. The precipitate remains.

We benefit from envy

Maybe it's much better to learn from other people because you don't succeed yet? For example, you saw a beautiful make-up - try to do something similar tomorrow. You do not know how - go to makeup courses for yourself. Maybe this will be an impetus for discovering new talents.

Have you seen a beautiful suit? What exactly did you like about it? Fashion? How does he sit on the figure? Do you know the secret of a well-suited suit and any other clothing? He picked UNDER THIS FIGURE AND MAN. Maybe if you wear the same suit to another person, it will not look so stunning. Here you should think about your body type and try to choose clothes for yourself. You probably have a lot of clothes in your wardrobe that you don't wear for some reason. I often change clothes, sew something, add something, combine different things in a new way. And the wardrobe will only benefit from this, because it always looks updated.

Get to know yourself!

Look at your facial features, soft or sharp, at your body type, what type it belongs to. Experiment with flowers in clothes, with fabrics. Look at yourself in a new way. Think about what style of clothing do you like the most?

I had a client who always dressed in classic costumes. But in the process of our communication it became clear that she dreams of ruffles, hairpins, etc. "Women's tricks". She is ashamed to dress like that for work and only at home she dresses the way she wants when no one sees her.

After talking, we decided to complement the strict business suits with a romantic blouse with light ruffles. You would see how her mood and general image improved! It has become much more harmonious!

Maybe the secret of success in the overall harmony of your image? What is harmony? In simple language: this is when all sides of our personality are in balance. It's so wonderful! When you feel "on your plate"!

Homework:

  • Write how you have changed over the past 1, 5, 10 years? What has gotten better for you? Maybe you have found your perfect hair color, maybe you have found your style, maybe you have finally decided to pursue your favorite hobby?
  • Go through your wardrobe. Sometimes, to clear our minds, we need to get rid of old junk. You can find a "treasure" - clothes that were once forgotten, and now it will be a great addition to your image.
  • When you go out, stop comparing yourself to others, take a closer look at people - why can you learn from them today? We can learn from many, even from a child (for example, his spontaneity and openness to the world).
  • Main wish!
  • And put yourself in the fact that you have read this article, so you are engaged in self-education and explore different ways to do it.